"Be the kind of partner you want your kid to have as their own partner one day"
is probably the best advice I received from my own parenting coach.
Lots of parents that consult with me regarding parental concerns, also struggle within their relationship. How can they not? When we are the parents of young children, we sleep less (or hardly), it’s physically draining, and on top of that, we also have to manage work, sometimes a career, the house, food, cleaning and more…. There is no time left for “ME”, so the “WE” is completely put aside, and lots of us will just “dump” our frustration and resentment on our partners….
What is THE biggest problem here? It’s that our kids are WATCHING us and LEARNING from us.
Young children gain understanding about relationships by OBSERVING us – They learn about gender roles, what’s love about, how does one resolve disagreements, how do you process anger, how do you show affection and so forth.
There is a huge probability your children will “choose” a partner just like the one they “observed” at home, so we do have an opportunity here to make a difference in their lives right now! We can “show” them which kind of partner we wish for them to have, by just BEING that partner.